First of all, I have every reason to be thankful to God, and
particularly those He has used as source of inspiration for me during
the year.
Being the last piece that will come from me this year, I need to thank everybody in P.M.NEWS
for giving me this rare opportunity to express myself in their highly
respected medium. And to those who have been responding to my articles, I
appreciate you all. I wish you all a Merry Christmas and New Year
celebrations .
Due to popular demand, I have decided to present one of my old articles this week.
Sometimes
I sit down and try to take stock of my life and its numerous stages. It
amazes me to see how far I have come, even in the midst of the storm.
God is indeed faithful to those who love and serve him.
Growing up
was a bit funny for me outside the walls of my home. I grew up in a
wonderfully balanced family with a lot of love and care from both my
parents, who were bankers, my older sisters who taught me so much, and
my late kid brother even though his time was short.
For some
reasons, I thought there was something wrong with me and I will tell you
why. I realised that in school my name always came up whether or not I
was a part of the issue. People just loved to talk about me; most of the
time it was more negative than positive. Even if I was guilty of
whatever they accused me of or not, they would still go on and on.
This
was such a huge problem for me as a young girl, to the point that I was
not able to enjoy boarding school. I thought the world hated me and I
did not fit in, and that was when I heard that people called me an Osu,
which means outcast, just because of my surname. That actually made me
laugh at the end of the day, seeing that most people did not even know
the origin or history of my name.
As funny as this might sound, I started avoiding people; I did not want to make friends so I had only two of them.
Deep
inside my heart I would think hard and try to trace the source of these
issues. It made me believe the saying that: there is no smoke without
fire. So, for people to say all these about me, there must have been
things I did that triggered the talk and the hatred. Now I know better
because the world has changed so much that all you need to do to attract
so much hatred and jealousy, is to EXIST.
After thinking so for
so long, I arrived at the same answer as before which was: I am not a
bad person and I have not done anything to deserve this.
No matter how hard I tried to believe my truth, people just had a way of putting me in a box.
This was entirely my fault because now I know for sure that no one can put you in a box unless you let them.
After so many years of being paranoid about what people were saying about me, I finally opened up to my parents.
My
mother laughed so hard that I wondered if she heard a word of what I
said. That was when my father (God rest his soul) looked at me and
said, “have you taken a good look at yourself in the mirror? Have you
not noticed how beautiful you are, or are you saying you do not know you
are intelligent?”
At that point I just felt it was a normal
encouragement line that a parent would give his child to make the child
feel better, but I soon realised it was far from it.
Then he said:
“Can’t you see that you are different because you are special? Do you
need anyone to tell you how blessed you are?”
I looked at him and said: “But daddy, if I am all these things, how come people say all these bad things about me?”
At
this point, I was almost crying, but in his usual way he looked at me
and said: “My friend, will you stand firm and listen to me? You and your
sisters are special, in fact very rare in a good way. You are like
Further Mathematics”.
“Ah ah daddy, what has Further Mathematics
got to do in this matter?” I had to ask that question to know if we
were on the same page.
My dad went ahead to explain: “Further
Mathematics is a subject just like every other one, there is nothing
evil or bad about it but people hate it so much. They hate it because
they believe it is very difficult. Now, it is difficult for them because
they don’t understand it.
“People hate what they don’t
understand, and the truth is that only a very few patient and
intelligent people will diligently study and understand it. When they
do, they become geniuses and professors.
“So, if people don’t
understand you and can’t place a tag on you, they will see you as a
difficult thing. Most people might not know how to handle your
intimidating presence, even when you don’t say a word.
“As a
result, they will end up saying negative things about you since they
can’t stand the strength of your existence. So, my dear why don’t you
focus your energy on the few who understand you and the positive things
your existence should bring?” he added.
That day changed my whole life so much, I was so grateful to my father for what he taught me.
As I was about to leave, my mother called me and said, “there are three types of people in this world:
A: Those who were born to be talked about because of who they are,
B: Those who were born to talk about others because that is all they are,
C: Those who were born to observe because they don’t know who they are,
Which one would you rather be my dear?” I smiled because I knew that I was a TYPE A.
After that day, I promised myself that I would never allow people who don’t even know me, make me feel like I am not worth it.
It
is very easy to sit down and talk about others, judge them and try to
destroy their reputation. In actual fact, your problems are much bigger
than you can carry, so you use idle talk to run away from your own
issues. Guess what? After you are done talking about others, your
problem that has been chilling on your bed, will be waiting for you to
come back and give it a big hug.
When you think about life, you might have a different analogy about God, the world and man.
This
is how I see it: God the creator sets a mini clock on every human
being, He opens his big shopping mall which is the earth. Then he gives
us all a shopping list to go into the shopping mall and buy everything
on our list. He also sets the clock to a time which he knows should be
enough for us to finish our shopping.
Bear in mind that everybody
has a different list, and from the moment he hands you the money
(talent, skills, health, wisdom, brain, etc) and your list, your own
clock starts to count.
So, imagine that we have all come to this
shopping mall, you see Stella walking in and out of shops buying the
things on her list. Then you stop and start to laugh at her ugly shoes,
you call your friends and start to talk about the old fashioned chair
she bought. Stella walks past you again and you start to laugh at her
cheap weavon and the fact that there is too much blue in her eye shadow.
In
all of this, you are so caught up in your psychoanalysis and gossip
about Stella, that you forget that your clock is ticking away.
Meanwhile, the person you are talking about is trying her best to buy
everything on her shopping list, and make it back home early before she
runs out of time.
This is what will happen; Stella will finish
buying the items on her list, and go home right on time. On the flip
side, you who have wasted more than half your own time following someone
around, will not be able to finish buying the things on your list
before the shop closes and your time is up.
A lot of people have filled up the graves with DEAD DREAMS and VISIONS. They spend the life span and energy God has given them for their own purpose on others and waste time minding other people’s business.
It is so sad and painful but most importantly it does not make sense to me, especially for adults.
Some
people say it is as a result of joblessness but I disagree. I insist
that if you have time to talk about others, then you should have time to
try and discover yourself, spend time knowing who you are.
What
is your purpose on earth? What are you supposed to be doing at this
point in your life? Are you satisfied with where you are right now? Are
you doing what you have always wanted to do?
Are you adding value
to people around you? Are you ready to take your situation to the next
level?What do you want to be remembered for? What are your ambitions?
Have you accomplished up to half the things you set for yourself?
Trust
me, if you spend your time trying to answer all these questions and
work on them, you will find that you won’t have time for idle talk, you
will also realise that you don’t have enough hours in a day to do the
things you really want to do, especially the things that you love.
My question to you is: What type of person are you? TYPE A, B or C?
I
know who I am and have no apologies about it. So, I hope you will make
it out of the shopping mall on time, at the right time with your items
complete.
Quote: Don’t waste your life on others with idle talk, spend it on you because you are worth your own time.
CREDIT: STELLA DAMASUSSource: PM News
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